Quick note about the title, it stands for: “Dayton Funny Bone Set – Opening Joke”, just so I can properly label it.

The opening to your set is crucial because it sets the pace for how the rest of your show will go.  If you open strong, you have a much better chance to do well for the rest of your time.  If you start off bad, it will take some really solid jokes to pull the audience back in.

Your opening joke should typically have very little set up and get right to the punch.  Generally, in a nice comedy club atmosphere you have 45 – 60 seconds to make the audience laugh before you completely lose them.  In a bar or other open mic setting, you have less than 30.  (Obviously this is different if you are a known headliner that people have been waiting to see.)

So keeping that in mind, I want to start off quick and have a few decent jokes within that first minute.

“Good evening everyone,. my name is Drew Tarvin, and I just want to let all the ladies know, that I am like a number one at Wendy’s… single [ACT OUT wink & point]

I’ve been single for two years now.. two years… that’s like, 2 decades in penis years.

And I was feeling down about not finding someone for so long, until today.  Because today, I read in an article that women love a man with a deep, sexy voice (pause) so I figure I’m set.

Because my voice ranks as one of the top sexy man voices.  Right up there with: Mike Tyson.  Mickey Mouse… Fran Drescher.”

Based on some timing estimates, this will put me close to a minute (take time for getting up there, hopefully having some applause, and pauses and laughter between the jokes).

So let me know what you think, does it make you want to listen some more?  And is saying penis still PG clean?